Pong (Arcade)
(plans to be released for other systems late next spring)
Taking the video gaming world by storm this century is the radical table tennis simulator, Pong. The aim of the game is to outwit your opponent in one- on-one tennis-style combat and emerge victorious with the most points. This game has everything. The graphics are outstanding and the gameplay will have you glued to the screen for literally minutes. Being both multiplayer and single player, with an AI paddle that will have you convinced that you are playing a real person, Pong earns so much respect that there is already a film, “The Chronicles of Pong”, planned to be released early in 2010. Early ru- mours suggest that Mel Gibson is to play the lead roll of “Player 1”.
SCORE: 5/5
Pac-Man (Arcade/Sinclair ZX Spectrum)
Capturing the hearts of even the most hard-hearted arcade patron, the ever-starving, ever-eating, anti-dieting, yellow ball of fun that is Pac-Man has the nation hooked on its addictiveness. The aim of the game is to guide the Pac-Man around a maze, eating every small dot and avoiding the enemy ghosts that chase after you. However, in a cunning twist to the game, you can eat the pulsating dots in the corners to make the ghosts turn tail in fear and chase after them instead, turning hunter into hunted. This game has not only capti- vated the attention of video gamers the world over, but it has also sparked heat- ed discussion in the media over wheth- er or not it is suitable for young chil- dren, and an 18 certificate has been considered, as it encourages children to eat and face their fears by taking behav- iour-altering substances which will make them think that they can eat ghosts. Whether Pac-Man will go down in history as a piece of pro-drug propa- ganda remains to be seen, but there is already a film, “Pac-Man Begins” enter- ing pre-production. Early rumours sug- gest that Mel Gibson is to play a sup- porting role as “Yellow Ghost”.
SCORE: 5/5
Donkey Kong (Dragon 32)
Game developers, ever trying to push the boundaries of computer games, every now and then make a mistake. Donkey Kong is one of them. In this game, you play a small man in overalls and a moustache who must rescue a princess from a giant gorilla by climb- ing to the top of a level and avoiding barrels and fireballs. The random mix of game play leads us to the conclusion that Donkey Kong is just too compli- cated and has sacrificed playability for superior graphics, which, although im- pressive, are no consolation. Although we acknowledge the effort put into Donkey Kong, it is fairly safe to say that games will never get more complicated than the industry standard. Also, to have a small man with a moustache who looks like a plumber as the lead in a game is absolutely absurd and will nev- er be a success. It would be like a Jap- anese company having as their mascot an Italian called “Mario”. Mel Gibson came forward earlier this week and publicly denounced the game as “Not Very Good”, and has quashed mutter- ings that he is planning a historical bio- graphical film of Donkey Kong going by the working title of “When Apes Get Horny”.
SCORE: 2/5