It’s March, and we’ve all run out of Extenuating Circumstances ex- cuses.
Below are some justifications that I’ve used during my time at UCL, which should provide a point of in- spiration during the last few weeks of term.*
- My mum had a dream in which Je- sus told her that I needed to submit an extenuating circumstances form.
- I was devasted by Harry’s royal family departure and was unable to work.
- I spent too long thinking about extenuating circumstances excuses and didn’t do any of my reading.
- My horoscope told me that I need to take my time with life.
- I was too busy playing with worms in in the garden.
- I missed two weeks of lectures be- cause I was trying to get my Sim to pass university.
- Tetris emergency.
- I had an STI test and received some bad news (super-gonorrhoea).
- I was bitten by worms while play- ing with them in the garden.
- I was preparing for UCL’s super exciting and not at all questionable Festival of Intimacy.
- I have a broken heart.
- I have a broken toe (tripped over running to collect an Amazon par- cel).
- My nipples were too sensitive to write the essay.
- I injured my back carrying the conversation in Zoom breakout rooms.
- I had to attend a funeral for the worms in my garden.
*Author’s Note: None of these excuses have worked. I am averag- ing a third.