Dear UCL Students’ Union,
Having arrived at university bright- eyed, bushy-tailed and ready to engage in extra-curricular activities, I’ve found myself deeply disappointed by the lim- ited scope of UCL’s 250+ student so- cieties. Online socials are comprised of three postgraduate strangers, while the horrors of small talk have been wors- ened by ten-fold. What’s more, these activities are plagued with apologies, black screens and claims that ‘my Wifi is being fixed today’.
In this context, I demand a society that embraces the charm of technical difficulties and social ineptitude. Yes - an opportunity for those who trem- ble for an hour after speaking a single sentence in a breakout room. A com- munity where connection issues are not deemed embarrassing but celebrated instead. We want, nay we NEED a Zoom Appreciation society.
Where else, if not here, would a frozen screen on an unflattering facial expression be reason for genuine jubia- tion? Who needs yoga society when being comforted for your connection issues is the sole cure to your chronic depression? Fun in this club shall in- clude activities such as
- Small-Group Counselling: Over- coming the Fear of Breakout Rooms
- Using the Chat Function in Silence
- Blending into Your Carefully Se- lected Background Image
I, of course, will appoint myself as the President. I am outstanding at ac- commodating the humiliation of hav- ing crappy audio and being cut off mid-sentence.
Sincerely, Reconnecting…