---------Original Message ----------
From: “Arkansas Smith” <arkansassmith@koolgenetic- s4kids.net>
To: “Steve Jones” <candiefloss69@ucl.ac.uk>
Subject: PhD research post...pretty please!
Dear Prof. Steve Jones, I hope you do not mind my writ- ing to you! For I know you are a most prodigiously busy man, what with your sporadic appearances on Newsnight (how is the lovely Kirsty Wark by the way?), in fact your general permanence on our illuminated screens, and — of course — your most beloved and re- spected popular science books. How- ever, it has not escaped my notice that you are advertising for a PhD student to work on your animal of choice, the noble and admirable Cepaea snail. And you know what? I think I would be per- fect for the post. I’m from K**gs you know, studying B****gy, and all my friends think I’m a bit mad!!!
You might be wondering why you should give me the post. Well, genetics has always captured the imagination of my fully-formed mind; it must date from my seeing Jurassic Park for the first time ever. The splendour and glo- ry of those dinos! Oh, the unfortunate critters, dealt such a cruel blow by fate. I have to confess that it has always been my ambition to create something truly awesome - a live dino. Just one, of course - we by no means want ram- paging dinos all over the shop! As you can tell the moral and practical mes- sages of Jurassic Park have not passed me by…Actually, come to think of it, the subjection of one dino to a life of earthly loneliness is a bit cruel. And a paucity of ethics, I think you’ll agree, is against everything modern genetics and UCL stand for! Maybe two dinos then? My God, we could even have fights à la Pokemon! (poke-‘im-mon!). Food for thought, no? Dinos: more al- luring than snails? Hope to hear from you soon!
Yours truly, Arkansas Smith
P.S. A copy of my CV is enclosed.
P.P.S. I greatly enjoyed your talk at the European Socialists’ Forum meet- ing! Now, if only we could get hold of some Cro-Magnon man DNA... ---------------------------------------
It’s fast, it’s easy and it’s free. Get cloning your kid brother/sister today! http://www.koolgenetics-4kids.net/legal_disclaimer.html
No no no, Biology researcher wrote this