WITH THE new term comes a new schedule of entertainment from the ever hardworking officers of UCL Union: sabbatical officers and student reps alike have used the summer break to produce a programme of themed events to entice even the most hardened fresher.
Despite suffering the loss of nearly half the capacity of the main union building, UCLU staff endeavoured to secure the Windeyer bar to house the alcohol-based life consolation habits of the typical student. Coupled with the loss of several drinking promotions, in particular the demise of Vodka 99s, improving the events has been no mean task. However UCLU’s Services and Events officer ‘rolled with the punches’ and has cunningly recycled all the old theme nights from last year.
“It took some time to come up with,” Williamson told The Cheese Grater in a gutter in Crouch End, “but we realised that since none of the freshers were around last year they probably wouldn’t be too bothered.” Indeed, with the roaring success of Chav night last year, seeing students from middle-class backgrounds dressing up to mock those less fortunate than themselves, the merry sabbatical officer hardly needed to conjure up any new themes. “If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it as they say.” chortled Williamson. “Chav night was just too good not to use again. It was really a good effort all round, some of the freshers looked just like the real deal, happily blowing their giro cheques on cheap booze!”
In an opportunity to further the extent to which students can merrily waste Government loans, Williamson and his colleagues have concocted a brand new theme for Mondays. The first ‘Home Counties’ night at the Windeyer is scheduled for 21st of November. “I can’t wait, it’s going to be a real old boys knees up!” enthused the sabb.
Given the popularity of past events, the new themed evening is undoubtedly going to be as equally outrageous. Already the night is causing a stir amongst UCL students. Alexander Tiddlington-Smith, (Philosophy II) said, “It’s going to bloody mad mate! I don’t know what to wear though; I was thinking a rugger shirt and a blazer.”