Want another gap year to complement the two you already took when you got those unexpected rejections? Want to be paid £24k to make Facebook groups? Want to makes assets out of your personality flaws? Want FREE COFFEE? Then it’s simple: become a UCLU sabbatical officer!
It’s a doddle! In the upcoming elections, have ten of your bestest chums vote for you. No one else actually cares, so you’ll get in without any trouble. After that, you don’t have to do anything at all. For an entire year! The perks are incredible. Not only is there free coffee on tap, but all sabbatical officers are allowed the use of the sabbatical pleasure suite to entertain/detain sexual conquests (so long as they clean up afterwards). Deal? Deal?! Yeah.