PI SQUARED recently suggested The Cheese Grater should employ some better writers. Whatever your thoughts on the matter, you can be certain that we won’t be looking to poach any Lie Squared staff. Taking a break from stories about sex, the newspaper ran an article on the Provost’s staff cuts with a particular focus on the reaction amongst Phonetics and Linguistics students upon learning that a staff member was to go. Although the article never directly stated Tim Wharton, the employee in question, was to be fired, it made a clear connection to his departure and the staff cuts. So imagine the surprise of London Student, when upon following up the story, they discovered that Tim Wharton knew nothing of the petition to save his job. Indeed, even Wharton wasn’t trying to stop his departure – he had been employed on a short term contract from the very start. All this of course, in the same issue of the newspaper that carried a grovelling apology to the RUMS Hockey Team after Deputy Editor Josh Blacker’s botched ‘investigation’ suggested that the entire team had been involved in an argument that ended with racist insults being traded.
‘UCL’S ALPHA FEMALE’ was so overjoyed to hear her column was parodied in the last issue of The Cheese Grater that she rung the Editor without even having read it. Mimi Noor’s demands for the piece to be read to her over the phone were politely declined. Clearly angry with the coverage, a close friend decided to set up a ‘The Mimi Noor Fans Group’ on Facebook. The group, which racked up an impressive 114 members, appears to have backfired miserably with support such as “Why have I been asked to join this group? I barely know Mimi Noor,” and “I have been unfortunate enough to waste three minutes of my life reading Mimi’s columns.” With friends like these, who needs enemies?