UCL’s imperial designs on other Bloomsbury buildings are a favourite subject for Mister Chatterbox (CG15, 08), College’s resident busybody and concerned citizen. The future, however, is something that Mister Chatterbox is very interested in indeed, and UCL’s plan for the next twenty years intrigues him greatly.
The draft 2034 Plan lays down the College’s aims and values for the next two decades. Mister Chatterbox noted that the document states its dedication to:“Ethically acceptable standards of conduct” and wants to “continue to at- tract global talent”. Bare minimum for a university, one might think, but UCL PLC feels the need to constantly remind people that education is its purpose. Mister Chatterbox cannot help but pon- der: does the Provost protest too much?
The only section in which College’s aims are laudably clear is“Financing our Ambitions.” College wishes to create surplus, whilst “spending appropriately on salaries.” Engineering Dean Profes- sor Anthony Finkelstein dodged enquir- ies as to whether appropriate payment meant acceding to UCU demands of higher pay, or whether it would mean an international student fee raise, remind- ing Chatterbox that they were already at the top of the market.
With this surplus, the Eastern front is set to be reopened: building on the Car- penter’s Estate was deemed “politically infeasible,” but UCL has nearly sealed the deal on a place in the Olympic Park.
UCLU Education & Campaigns Of- ficer, Keir Gallagher, was keen to remind Mister Chatterbox that UCL’s current surplus is a none-too-unimpressive £20M, and laid out his concerns about the Plan’s financial dealings: “The gaping hole in this section is no mention of lob- bying government for greater funding for Higher Education, which should be the primary income stream for uni- versities, not student tuition fees.”
The thing which niggles at Mister Chatterbox is this: if fees are not raised, and wages continue at the current level, where will the hordes of gold be found? Professor Saladin Garcia-Meckled, Aca- demic Board member, asserted to Chat- terbox that College would get a “mas- sive” loan and increase student numbers by 25%, with a greater proportion of international students topping up the change jar. Mister Chatterbox waits to be convinced on the merit of these twenty pages of buzzwords and finan- cial skulduggery.