The Time Machine

Provost / 1 March 2013

Bye Bye Malcolm!

A look back at the times of departing Provost Malcolm Grant

Anonymous

Malcolm John Grant was born on the 29th November 1947 in Oamaru, New Zealand, a seaside town home to two species of penguin.

ALSO ON THAT FATEFUL DAY: UN votes for the parti- tion of Palestine and the crea- tion of Israel. Coincidence?

Grant went on to study at the University of Otago, gaining a Bachelors of Law in 1970 followed by a Masters of Law in 1973. The university was home to a strong student protest movement at the time, most notably against the Viet- nam War. During this period Malcolm developed his trademark moustache, perhaps to woo hippy ladies away from inevitable ruin and into his open arms.

2003

  • Leaves his role as Pro-Vice-Chancellor of the University of Cambridge to become the ninth Provost of University College London.

2004

  • Launches ‘The Campaign for UCL’, an ambi- tious fundraising appeal attempting to raise £300 million over 10 years.

  • Rebrands UCL as “London’s Global University”. Denies accusations that the re-branding exercise cost £600,000.

  • Attracts criticism for UCL’s investment in weapons companies, notably BAE Systems.

2005

  • Grant shaves off his beloved moustache after an invitation from The Cheese Grater, raising over £2,300 for charity.

‘INTERESTING’ FACT: Gram for gram, this makes Grant’s moustache more valuable than platinum.

  • Attempts to slash staff numbers by 25% in order to alleviate a 1.5% deficit in UCL’s turnover, prompting a backlash from many senior aca- demics.

2008

  • Thwarted in his attempt to acquire Senate House for UCL during a period of turbulent relations with the University of London. This fol- lowed the decision of many larger UoL instutions to start awarding their own degrees from 2007 - previously all degree certificates were awarded centrally by the University of London.

“Malcolm can be very frustrating. He picks up on people’s insecurities and uses them to win an argument” - Committee member of the UoL Constutional Review Working Group

2009

  • Brands The Daily Telegraph “Islamophobic” after the paper accused UCL of being complicit in the radicalisation of Mus- lim former student Umar Farouk Abdulmutallab, who tried to blow up a US-bound aircraft on Christmas Day.

2011

  • Reneges on an earlier promise to implement the London Liv- ing Wage for all UCL staff.

  • Unveils the Bloomsbury Masterplan, a £500 million overhaul of UCL’s main campus that will see many services removed, including the Gower Place Practice. Grant also announces plans to construct a new £1 billion UCL campus in Stratford, a move that will evict 700 local residents.

2012

  • A UCLU motion of no confidence in Grant is overturned by referendum. The motion was proposed by students in response to Grant’s appointment as Chair of the NHS Commisioning Board by then Health Secretary, Andrew Lansley.

“I find it difficult to demonstrate because I am not a patient of the NHS” - Malcolm Grant’s response to MPs when asked to demonstrate his passion for the National Health Service.