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Emergency Soc Bitch: The Sun Shines on Small-Boat-Bashing UCL Tories

Emergency Soc Bitch: The Sun Shines on Small-Boat-Bashing UCL Tories

UCL and KCL Tory Socs announced a new “Port and Policy” event this week with the motions for debate being: “This house would inva...
Booze, Boys, and Bastards

Booze, Boys, and Bastards

God EFS, I’m getting really bored of you lot now. I’ve honestly started to lose track of the amount of times I’ve griped about yo...
The Bitch is Back with a Bang!

The Bitch is Back with a Bang!

Oh, you poor gossip deprived students. I bet you missed me. And with such a large break from when you last heard from me, we have...
What is it with all you horny, deviant sex pests?

What is it with all you horny, deviant sex pests?

Welcome to all of you enthusiastic freshers and commiserations to the depressed second and third years. It’s time for freshers' f...
More than hearts were stolen this V-Day…

More than hearts were stolen this V-Day…

Valentine’s Day was a real treat for Soc bitch this year. Honestly, any V-Day would have been better than last year in which I tan...
Festive Goss

Festive Goss

I’m not sure what grinds my gears more: the callousness of holding a series of parties in Downing Street during lockdown...
FFS EFS

FFS EFS

Soc Bitch is in the foulest of moods, and it’s not just because she couldn’t book Mully’s for her annual Christmas gin-shindig. Un...
Soc Bitch on dodging balls and morals

Soc Bitch on dodging balls and morals

If I asked you which Harry Potter book reminded you most of EFS, you might be tempted to say the Deathly Hallows. But, in light of...
Soc Bitch: Freshers Edition

Soc Bitch: Freshers Edition

Well, well, well, if it isn’t your favourite drama queen back on campus. Unfortunately, I’ll also be joined by two years’ worth of...
Soc Bitch continues to school the Education Officer

Soc Bitch continues to school the Education Officer

Hey you cool cats and kittens – you better get your napkins ready because Soc Bitch is about to spill the tea. We were all pretty ...
Education officer gets schooled by Soc Bitch

Education officer gets schooled by Soc Bitch

Last night, during a daily I-hate-my-life scroll through Instagram, Soc Bitch came upon a post that shocked her to her core! It...
Tamil Soc disaffiliated by fresher tip

Tamil Soc disaffiliated by fresher tip

Santa Claus is coming to town and believe me I hate all that festive joy crap. I promise I’m not going to whine about Bojo again. ...
Homophobia is kinda spooky, I guess…

Homophobia is kinda spooky, I guess…

This Halloween, Soc Bitch has never been more spooked than by the Grinch Boris who wants to steal Christmas with another confusing...
Soc Bitch – Self Loathing Edition

Soc Bitch – Self Loathing Edition

Soc Bitch is pleased to report that The Cheese Grater has once again stirred enough shit to be able to bitch about itself again. ...
Soc Bitch: Brexit Edition

Soc Bitch: Brexit Edition

What with this being a Brexit issue and all, you may have made the oh so-rash assumption that Soc Bitch would be taking a break fr...
UCL Drama Soc brings Christmas (very) early

UCL Drama Soc brings Christmas (very) early

As UCL’s lesser fictional gossip-mongers are shutting up shop for Christmas merriment, Soc Bitch works late into the night to brin...
RUMS elders pass on their knowledge

RUMS elders pass on their knowledge

Soc Bitch has awakened from her summer long daze, ready to share the most exciting of UCL’s intrigue and corridor whispers, this t...
UCL medics glass attendees at debauched sports ball

UCL medics glass attendees at debauched sports ball

It is with a heavy heart that Soc Bitch must announce that RUMS Sports Teams are at it again. Pandemonium ensued at last night’...
AGMs in “the worst” shocker

AGMs in “the worst” shocker

It’s AGM season which means it’s time to make fun of jumped-up students who act like they’re hiring an international executive, no...
And all that jazz

And all that jazz

This month, Soc Bitch was distraught to learn of an attempt to trample on CG’s turf. In January, a group of students submitted a r...
Is it really all over for Men’s Rugby?

Is it really all over for Men’s Rugby?

Can it be true? UCL Men’s Rugby, long the bête noire of your fair columnist, has been disaffiliated from the Union. In June, the...
Men’s Rugby has been disaffiliated

Men’s Rugby has been disaffiliated

It is with no small amount of schadenfreude that Soc Bitch can announce that UCL Men's Rugby has been disaffiliated from Students'...
The show is over for Magic Society

The show is over for Magic Society

UCL Magic Society has been disaffiliated from the union after a failure to conjure up enough card-carrying members spelled disaste...
RUMS Boat Club does not have a problem with drinking and sexual harassment

RUMS Boat Club does not have a problem with drinking and sexual harassment

Soc Bitch takes seriously her solemn responsibility to highlight the stupid, sexist, and unsavoury. Thus, it is with teary eyes th...
Drama Soc’s Papaya gets Slashed

Drama Soc’s Papaya gets Slashed

UCL Drama Soc left the Fringe with a bloody nose after The Scotsman, that most beloved of Scottish-radical-rags, deposited a steam...
Comedy of Errors: The Drama Soc Story

Comedy of Errors: The Drama Soc Story

If you have a pulse and a Facebook account, you’re probably familiar with those giants of social media, UCLove and UCLoathe. For t...
Just some nonsense that happened during the UCU strike

Just some nonsense that happened during the UCU strike

Variety being the spice of life, Soc Bitch has this month directed her withering gaze towards the strike-related drama on the UCU ...
UCL Men’s Rugby Encourage “Oriental Attire” For Tonight’s Chinese New Year Celebrations

UCL Men’s Rugby Encourage “Oriental Attire” For Tonight’s Chinese New Year Celebrations

Though their Hugh Hefner memorial back in October didn’t go to plan, Soc Bitch wishes Men’s Rugby all the luck in celebrating Chin...
UCL Boat Club Plan Meeting to Solve The Patriarchy… No Women Invited

UCL Boat Club Plan Meeting to Solve The Patriarchy… No Women Invited

In the ongoing struggle against the old dog of misogyny, Soc Bitch has learned that two valiant young men from UCL Boat Club have ...
In Last Sportsnite Of The Year: Medics Fight For Right to Vom

In Last Sportsnite Of The Year: Medics Fight For Right to Vom

It is with a heavy heart that Soc Bitch must announce that RUMS Sports Teams are at it again. For the past several years, any i...
Update On THAT Netball-Rugby Social

Update On THAT Netball-Rugby Social

Soc Bitch’s most fevered groupies may recall earlier this week her article posted online about a planned joint social between UCL ...
UCL Netball & Rugby host Playboy memorial for Hugh Hefner

UCL Netball & Rugby host Playboy memorial for Hugh Hefner

In honour of the death of his majesty and fabulous lord Hugh Hefner (their words, not mine), UCL Netball are putting their best fo...